Your Zodiac Symbol Has Changed: Aquarius
Nov 4, 2020, in
Astrology
The Secret Masters Of Astrological Knowledge (SMOAK) have declared that the traditional symbols for all twelve Zodiac Signs have been replaced and updated effective November 1st of this year. The average Aquarius isn’t the type of person to play along with some Central Committee dictating things to them, normally. But you guys should be thankful for this. I mean, the Water Bearer? Really? What does that even mean? Something about spilling out cosmic wisdom, or whatever. Any other symbol of the zodiac gives you at least some idea what it’s about, like a bull or a scorpion or two fish swimming in opposite directions or whatever. You were due for an upgrade Aquarius, and here it is.
THE SIGN: Aquarius (January 20 – February 19)
FORMER SYMBOL: The Water Bearer
WHAT THE FORMER SYMBOL GOT RIGHT: See above
NEW SYMBOL: The Platypus (Ornithorhynchus anatinus)
WHAT THE NEW SYMBOL ADDS: People get freaked out by how weird the platypus is. It’s a mammal, but it lays eggs. It lactates, but it doesn’t have nipples. It has a beak like a duck that it uses to sense magnetic fields like a shark. The male platypus has a poisonous spur on its hind foot, like a snake’s fang. And recently it has been discovered that they are biofluorescent. In other words, under UV light, they glow in the dark.
What’s this got to do with Aquarius? People get freaked out by the platypus because it doesn’t fit any of their easy categories as to how a mammal should be. Nonetheless the platypus has been doing just fine doing its own thing, thank you very much, for thousands of years. It doesn’t need you judging it or trying to file or classify it in order to do so. Also, much like many an Aquarius, the platypus often thinks to itself that, in fact… you’re the weirdo.
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